Soon I will welcome my son, if nothing happens, June 24th is the big day. Our happy family of three will become four. There are so many things that run through my mind. This is the worst symptom of pregnancy, your imagination runs crazy. No one tells you that, but it does.

The birth of my daughter almost 4 years ago did not go as planned to say the least. I became pre-clamptic, eventually was put on bed rest, was induced when blood pressure skyrocketed to 215/110, had 22 hours of labor with 2 failed epidurals, and emergency c-section in which they knocked me unconscious for three hours and my daughter was born with the umbilical cord wrapped around her neck. My husband said she was fine, but after they put me all back together, the nurse noticed they had a missing sponge…you got it…it was in my belly. They took me back apart, but unlike Humpty Dumpty I was able to be put back together again. Thank goodness I was knocked out. My after care was just as lousy. So I KNOW what can happen.

This pregnancy I am healthier, although today my blood pressure is up and I have just been tested for pre-clampsia again. I find out Friday the results but I doubt it. I just don’t feel it. I am worrying about other things though.

* Since I was unconscious for the first c-section I am nervous about experiencing this one.

* I worry about my 3yr old being without me for three days. Will she be ok? Will she miss me? What if she doesn’t?

* I worry about my hubby.

* I worry about the dynamics of our family changing from 3 to 4.

* I worry about if I will love my son as much as my daughter (who I adore).

* I worry about caring for a toddler and a baby.

* I worry my back handing it all (I have a very bad back)

* I worry about getting everything done in a day. How do people do it?

* I worry about our house is quickly becoming too small.

* I worry about raising a son.

So when people tell me everything going on it the world, I hear it and it either scares me or saddens me, but right now I got all I can worry about.