There is someone in our life we tend to forget (other than ourselves which I wrote on a previous blog). Our significant other. They tend to get a viewing pass into our lives but rarely do they come up on stage. We will make excuses to get out of intimacy (usually exhaustion). We will them all the errands they need to do, and hand them a honey to do list. When they want to do something for themselves like buy a motorcycle, go fishing, etc…we sigh, we roll our eyes, we may even tell them no. A priest told me a very important thing once. You are a mate not a mat for your significant other. It is the same the other way around. So stop wiping your feet on them, and maybe they will follow suit. Because as mothers, women, and spouses we have more than enough love to share, we just need to give some to them….

The birth of my daughter almost 4 years ago did not go as planned to say the least. I became pre-clamptic, eventually was put on bed rest, was induced when blood pressure skyrocketed to 215/110, had 22 hours of labor with 2 failed epidurals, and emergency c-section in which they knocked me unconscious for three hours and my daughter was born with the umbilical cord wrapped around her neck. My husband said she was fine, but after they put me all back together, the nurse noticed they had a missing sponge…you got it…it was in my belly. They took me back apart, but unlike Humpty Dumpty I was able to be put back together again. Thank goodness I was knocked out. My after care was just as lousy. So I KNOW what can happen.

This pregnancy I am healthier, although today my blood pressure is up and I have just been tested for pre-clampsia again. I find out Friday the results but I doubt it. I just don’t feel it. I am worrying about other things though.

* Since I was unconscious for the first c-section I am nervous about experiencing this one.

* I worry about my 3yr old being without me for three days. Will she be ok? Will she miss me? What if she doesn’t?

* I worry about my hubby.

* I worry about the dynamics of our family changing from 3 to 4.

* I worry about if I will love my son as much as my daughter (who I adore).

* I worry about caring for a toddler and a baby.

* I worry my back handing it all (I have a very bad back)

* I worry about getting everything done in a day. How do people do it?

* I worry about our house is quickly becoming too small.

* I worry about raising a son.

So when people tell me everything going on it the world, I hear it and it either scares me or saddens me, but right now I got all I can worry about.

I wish mothers would do things for themselves more. It makes us better mothers, better wives, better friends, and better humans. So make a honey to do list for yourselves mothers..and do them…you will be glad you did.

As I lay there with the goop on my belly, my doctor is doing the ultrasound and my husband is gazing at the screen, I hear myself asking, so what is wrong…the answer is simple…Nothing. My doctor said basically I don’t even need him right now. So I am optimistic this will all continue, but the worrier in me says month 8 may bring new issues. Until then….I smile..and thank God that today IS a good day.

You can look at any situation and after you are done sucking on that sourness, you eventually try to either learn from it, alter your plans which may end up for the best in the long run, or just end up with that funny looking “I just sucked on a sour lemon” face.

I do try to do the learning from it or the altering (which really does end up a lot of time better). Sometime though I am stuck with that face for awhile, but you know what I learned? Being upset, complaining about it to no end, does not change it. You are the only one who can. So take those lemons, add some sugar and move on…don’t worry more lemons are heading your way, but so are some blessings. Just take it one day at a time.

Quick & Easy:

Parmesan-Crusted Chicken Fingers

Olive or vegetable oil cooking spray

2/3 c. panko (Japanese-style) breadcrumbs
1/4 c. grated Parmesan cheese
2 T. chopped fresh parsley (optional)
1/4 t. ground black pepper
1 T. Dijon mustard
2 egg whites
1 lb. chicken tenders

Place a rack in the top third of the oven. Heat the oven to 425 F. Set a wire rack on a baking sheet and coat the rack lightly with cooking spray.

In a shallow bowl, stir together the breadcrumbs, Parmesan cheese, parsley (if using) and pepper. In another shallow bowl, whisk together the mustard and egg whites until frothy and opaque.

Dip each chicken tender in the egg white mixture, then in the breadcrumb mixture to coat all sides. Place on the prepared rack.

Spritz the top of each tender lightly and evenly with cooking spray, then turn and repeat on the other side. Bake until the crumb coating is golden brown and crisp and the chicken is no longer pink at the center, about 15 to 20 minutes. Serve immediately. Makes 4 servings.

Hearty & Ethnic:

Jay’s (Yep me again) Asian Beef & Noodles

14 ¾ oz of Beef tenderloin all fat removed and cubed (3 in filet minion steaks)
1 T of Sesame Oil
1 T of Soy Sauce
1 t of Rice Vinegar
1 Tsp of fresh grated ginger
1 t of beef bullion granules
1 T of Chili Garlic Sauce
2 T of Hoisen Sauce
1 t of black pepper
2 garlic cloves minced
3 scallions bottoms, minced
3 T of water

Put all ingredients in a bowl and let marinade at least 1 hour.

1 c of fresh chopped spinach
½ c of shredded carrots
6-7 asparagus (chopped in half and split down the middle)
3 scallion tops chopped
1 c of fresh green beans, chopped into pieces
1 pkg of Soba or Udon Noodles.

Bring Water to boil and noodles and follow directions on package. In a hot pan sear the beef. Put the veggies in except the spinach. Cook for till almost tender add the spinach and stir in. Combine the drained noodles with.

Lent Friendly & Tasty:

Calypso Shrimp with Black Bean-Citrus Salsa by Betty Crocker

makes:4 servings

Shrimp and Marinade
2 teaspoons grated orange peel
1/4 cup orange juice
1/2 teaspoon seasoned salt
4 cloves garlic, finely chopped
1 lb uncooked large shrimp (21 to 30), peeled, deveined
1 tablespoon canola oil

Salsa
1 can (15 oz) Progresso® black beans, drained, rinsed
1 medium orange, peeled, divided into segments, membrane removed and cut in half
1/4 cup Old El Paso® Thick ‘n Chunky salsa
2 tablespoons chopped fresh cilantro
1 teaspoon grated lime peel
2 cloves garlic, finely chopped

In 8-inch square (2-quart) glass baking dish, mix orange peel, orange juice, seasoned salt and 4 cloves chopped garlic. Add shrimp; turn to coat. Cover with plastic wrap; refrigerate up to 2 hours to marinate.

In medium bowl, mix all salsa ingredients. Cover; let stand until ready to serve (or refrigerate if longer than 30 minutes).

In 10-inch nonstick skillet, heat oil over medium-high heat. Drain shrimp; discard marinade. Cook shrimp in oil 2 to 3 minutes, stirring frequently, until shrimp are pink. Among 4 dinner plates, divide salsa. Arrange shrimp around salsa.

Island Kale and Sweet-Potato Soup by Food & Wine Magazine – 4 Servings

Inspired by Caribbean callaloo, this tropical, coconut-milk-spiked soup can be mildly or wildly spicy, according to your taste. If you like it hot, add some or all of the jalapeno seeds or a splash of Tabasco sauce.

INGREDIENTS

• 2 tablespoons cooking oil
• 1 onion, chopped
• 2 cloves garlic, minced
• 1 jalapeño pepper, seeds and ribs removed, sliced thin
• 3/4 pound kale, tough stems removed, leaves washed well and shredded (about 1 quart)
• 1 1/2 pounds sweet potatoes (about 3), peeled and cut into 3/4-inch cubes
• 1 1/2 quarts canned low-sodium chicken broth or homemade stock
• 1 1/2 teaspoons salt
• 1 cup canned unsweetened coconut milk
• 1 cup long-grain rice

DIRECTIONS

• In a large saucepan, heat the oil over moderately low heat. Add the onion and cook, stirring occasionally, until translucent, about 5 minutes. Stir in the garlic and jalapeño and cook, stirring, until fragrant, about 30 seconds.
• Stir in the kale, sweet potatoes, broth and salt and bring to a boil. Reduce the heat and simmer, partially covered, until the potatoes are tender, about 20 minutes. Add the coconut milk and just heat through.
• Meanwhile, bring a medium pot of salted water to a boil. Stir in the rice and boil until just done, 10 to 12 minutes. Drain. Put a mound of rice in the center of each bowl. Ladle the soup around the rice.
• Notes: Crinkly kale leaves are wonderfully sturdy and flavorful, making them especially well-suited to soups. Remove and discard the thick stems and then wash the leaves really well before adding them to a dish. The twists and turns of kale leaves are great places for dirt to hide.

Slow Cooker Chipotle-Lime Chicken Thighs Jamaican Rice and Peas by Robin Miller

1 cup sliced onion
1 cup chopped celery
1 cup chopped carrots
4 pounds skinless chicken thighs
Salt and freshly ground black pepper
1 (15-ounce) can tomato sauce
1/4 cup lime juice
1 tablespoon minced chipotle chiles in adobo sauce with 1 teaspoon sauce from can
2 cloves garlic, minced
1 avocado, diced
1/4 cup chopped fresh cilantro leaves
Lime wedges, for garnish

Arrange onion, celery and carrots in bottom of slow cooker. Season chicken thighs with salt and pepper and arrange over vegetables.

In a medium bowl, whisk together tomato sauce, lime juice, chipotle chiles with sauce, and garlic. Pour mixture over chicken.

Cover and cook on low for 6 to 8 hours or high for 3 to 4 hours. Serve half of the thighs with this meal (topped with diced avocado and cilantro and garnished with lime wedges) and reserve remaining thighs for another meal.

Jamaican Rice and Peas:
2 cups instant white rice or instant brown rice
1 (14-ounce) can low fat coconut milk
1 cup water
1 (15-ounce) can Kidney red beans, drained

½ c of peas
1 teaspoon dried thyme
1/2 teaspoon finely grated lime zest
1/4 cup chopped scallions
Salt and freshly ground black pepper

In a medium saucepan, combine rice, coconut milk, water, beans, thyme, and lime zest. Set pan over high heat and bring to a simmer. Reduce heat to low, add peas, cover and simmer 5 minutes, until liquid is absorbed. Fold in scallions and season to taste with salt and pepper.

Jay’s (Yes that’s me) Baked Orange Roughy

4 large Carrots cut julienne style

4-5 celery stalks cut julienne style

1 med. onion, thinly sliced

1 T of Fresh Chopped Basil

1 T of Fresh Chopped Parsley

2 to 4 fillets of Orange Roughy

2 T of No Sugar Added Orange Marmalade

1/4 c. Lemon Juice

1 T of Lime Juice

1 garlic clove minced

1 tsp of honey

1 tsp. tsp sea salt

1 tsp of black pepper

2 tbsp. Melted Smart Balance butter or reg butter

Toss carrots, celery, onion, and basil together. Spread 1/2 of this mixture in a shallow casserole pan. Place fish on top. Cover with the rest of the remaining vegetables. Combine in a bowl the butter, lemon juice, lime juice, garlic, honey, sea salt, pepper, and Marmalade. Cover and bake in a preheated 450 degree oven for 15 to 20 minutes until fish is opaque and flakes with fork. Remove the Veggies and discard. Spoon Sauce over fish and then Serve.

I touched back on a previous blog, “My Social Media Friends – Why I Need Them” the importance of some friends that I have on these sites and the different reasons why. But today want to write about, “Is Social Media an Addiction, Illness, or a Must Have?” For me it’s all three.

My husband introduced me to MySpace maybe 3 years ago. I thought this is great. Being a new Stay At Home Mom I was not used to not being surrounded by my peers. I had a job that demanded a lot of me that involved many people. All of sudden there I was sitting there looking at a infant not use to hearing only my own voice. Myspace became a Savior at first. I connected with a few friends and some local people. I loved making my profile unique and my own. I thought I would never tire of my new “Addition”, MySpace.  But alas, like any human with a shiny new toy, I got bored.

Then my husband introduced me to Facebook. I hated it. It was the “Anti” Myspace in the fact it was not personalized like Myspace with the Layouts and the music and the images allowed. Not to mention “The Wall” of Facebook was annoying to me.  But sometimes we are against change, but change is actually what we wanted whether we knew it or not. Facebook became my new “Addiction”. MySpace slowed down to almost nonexistent activity and Facebook is active almost every minute of the day. I am friends with almost everyone I went to high school with, old co-workers, old friends, and family. There is not a day I do not check it. Some of my friends would not embrace Facebook, but like an “Illness”, it spread. Now even those who were against any form of Social Media are fighting the “Illness”, the “Addiction”. They are hooked and getting others hooked everyday.

Finally a” Must Have” is where is ends for me. Between Twitter, where I chat my random thoughts with mostly strangers and Facebook where I get my everyday fixes and friendships from many, I am fulfilled. (Myspace..still have it but nothing happens on it..ever..) I think whether you are a stay at home parent, or someone who works in an office 50 hours a week, Social Media is a “Must Have”. It keeps us human, in touch with so many that we would have not had connections with before the internet. It keeps us abreast of our fellow man. It makes us thinks of others, if only for five minutes in our busy lives. It gives us sounding boards and loads of advice. It tells the place to be on Friday night and a place to try the next time you are on vacation. It gives us our connection to Life. So what are you waiting for, join one, we’re all waiting…..You know where I’ll be…

You forget how uncomfortable you can get. You forget how hungry you are. You forget that there is possible acne,  mood swings, nausea, and dizziness. You forget cravings (mine is Raspberry Ice Tea – and no fast food place carries it, so I get it at restaurants, sigh.). You forget the horror stories people feel they must tell you when they find out your pregnant (either about pregnancy or childbirth of someone they know or themselves). This is a tremendous pet peeve of mine. You forget how tired you get. You forget how worried you are about anything and everything. You forget how neurotic you sometimes become especially with the internet at your finger tips. You forget how many times you go to the bathroom. You forget that you will not sleep through a night in a very long time. You forget that smells, people, or noises may seriously bother you. You forget you will not see your feet easily. You forget you lose you innie belly button (time to clean that lint). You forget your nipples and skin can get that dark!

You also forget that wonderful moment you first see your baby on the ultrasound or hear the heartbeat for the first time. You forget how that flutter feels in your belly as your baby starts to move. You forget the kicks and the jabs and although it may at times be painful, it is a reminder your baby is well and growing. You forget the excitement of getting things ready for the new baby. You forget the happiness you feel when you have picked your baby’s name. You forget how sometimes people treat pregnant women wonderfully, and hopefully it will be your honey that is in that club of people. You forget that one day soon, there will be a little baby handed to you that you help make and that baby will love you and depend on you for many years to come. You forget that it all goes by so fast…..

I went to my local AAA to book a vacation to Orlando, FL. I had never been to Orlando but I thought what a perfect place for a family. I chose the hotel/resort, Bahama Bay Resort & Spa through the internet and presented it to AAA. My specific agent had never done business with this hotel. They booked it through a travel agency called, Travel Impressions. Bahama Bay Resort looked amazing on the Internet. I chose a room (The Andros) that had two side by side bedrooms with what appeared to have walk in closet in the Master (one room was a King Bed for my husband and I and one was a basic room for my daughter). It had two balconies (from the blue prints presented on the website the larger balcony was off of the living room. The smaller balcony off the master bedroom) There was a large master bath, with a huge soaking tub (good for my achy body) and a shower. There was another bathroom with a shower/bath combo. There was a decent sized kitchen, an open floor plan of a dining room and living room. Then to end it all there a small laundry room by the foyer. There were several pools (found out only 2 of 5 are heated) on the grounds, and a mini beach, Jacuzzi, a pond, a Spa, a couple of restaurants, a small Arcade, a playground, and a small childrens’ pool (ended up being not heated). It looked perfect. Everyone I showed it to loved it, and some considered as a future destination stay for their families.

My AAA agent called Travel Impressions to ensure we were indeed getting that room. I told her I did not want the not as nice room, I believed it was the San Salvador room. Both agencies said no, we were definitly getting all that we requested including and specifically the Andros. Ha boy were both of them wrong. We arrived on a Monday. In retrospect, it is my belief that they did not have a ton of people there on this day and were consolidating people to certain buildings. They must have around 20 buildings with a very Southern Plantation Type appearance.  We checked in. Me pregnant, with my 3 yr old behind me and my hubby. The lady at check in was very nice. We chatted about all the amenities at the resort and I explained to her how my family and I were looking forward to using them. She then said we had been “Upgraded” to a beautiful 3 bedroom. I told her we didn’t need 3 bedrooms and I liked the room we had booked. She said I guarantee you will love this one as much. So I thanked her thinking wow what a nice place. Can’t believe I am so naive. She said I needed to pay an additional $73 Cleaning Fee, everyone pays it at check in for the cleaning of the room prior to our arrival. I paid and we were off to follow the map to our building.

We were placed in one of the furthest buildings from the amenities. Guess what else, we were placed on the 3rd floor! That is 6 flights of stairs. Me pregnant and a year after spinal surgery and with a degenerative back with a 3 yr old. I was beyond exasperated. But my husband said c’mon it’s an upgrade I’ll carry everything up. After we got in we were disappointed.  (Pictures below- I could only upload a couple) The furniture appearance was chipping and scratched horribly and the laminate was coming off the kitchen cabinets. There were stains everywhere from the lamps to the carpet. Some of the lights did not work. Two of the ceiling fans sounded like they might fly off at any second. The Master Bedroom had a small queen bed. (We personally sleep in a king at home for a reason). Master bath, ha! Try little basic bathroom with a tiny tub (no bath for me). The balconies were super small. They were the same size and only had two chairs and a table. (We saw what we were supposed to have as we walked the grounds, huge balconies with four chairs & table with room to move). The toaster worked only on one side (and the other side eventually broke during our stay). The carpet still had some dead bugs and dirt against the sideboards and was SOAKED in spots from them shampooing. I know picky huh, but in my defense, The Bahama Bay Resort & Spa markets itself as “Luxurious Villas”. I have seen some better shaped furniture at the Holiday Inn. Besides this is not what we paid for or was promised.

We had already hiked everything up, but I decided to call an voice my disdain. The lady on the other line could not have cared less. She said look you are in an upgrade (like I should be grateful was her tone). I explained to her the beds, how my 3 yr old would be sleeping on the other side of the villa from myself.  How we could not all fit on the balconies and explained what we were promised. She said you are never promised anything here. You get what you get, from the view to beds. I said I want the room I was to originally get. She exclaimed in an annoyed tone, Look if you want to be “downgraded” be my guest. But we will charge you additional $73 cleaning fee. I told her that was not fair, she told me that is the way it is. So we did not want to pay it again out of principal, but we should have because we hated that villa. It was a horrible start to the vacation. The steps were terrible with a 3yr old 6 times a day.

Later on I called and asked for fans (for white noise) for the villa, they said they would call me back. Two hours later I called again to find out the status, they said they would call me back. They never did. This is what you can expect there. If you are hoping for luxurious accommodations I am sure they have them, but I would demand to see my room before ever paying any fees. Also I wrote out a survey letter of this account even telling them everything that happened and that I had pictures to back up my claims, 9 days later no one has ever contacted us. If you are planning a trip to Orlando, remember you have been warned of the Bahama Bay Resort and Spa.

One of the many stained areas on the carpet

The pics to back up my Bahama Bay Resort Review:

The Laminate on the Kitchen Cabinet

The Living Room Furniture

More Living Room Furniture

Living Room Table

The Stained Non-Working Lamp